Getting To That Point

I was filling out one of those questionnaires the other day. You know the ones. You answer a bunch of questions and then send it to all your friends so they can get to know you better and see how funny you are. And then they do it back to you and you can, in turn, laugh about how funny and witty they are and marvel at your differences and similarities and revel in the nuances various quirks that make us all the individuals we are.

Well, one of the questions caused me to pause. It asked: Are you where you want to be in life? The question didn't seem very difficult at first. I did a quick emotional once-over and decided that, overall, I was a content person. I promptly posted my answer in the affirmative. But then I got to thinking... do I even know where I expect me to be in life? I don't think I do. And where exactly am I headed? Well, I don't think I know that either. And I suddenly wondered if I suffer from a gross lack of expectation. Me! Of all people! I set goals for myself on a bi-annual basis. You'd THINK I'd know where I am and am going. But really, I don't think I do. And I'm not sure what I think about that.

You see, I don't know that I expected myself to be married by now. It just so happens I am. I don't know if I expected myself to have children. It just so happens I don't. I don't know how much schooling I thought I'd have. I happen to think right now I have enough. I don't know if I expected to own real estate now. It just so happens it seemed like a good idea a few years ago. And I don't know if I expected to own a dog by now. It just doesn't seem like a good time yet. And suddenly I realize I made it very easy for me to be content with where I am. I never really wanted to be anywhere in particular. How could I disappoint myself?

Now, I've also thought about my life choices a lot lately. I never decided I wanted to be a doctor or a lawyer or a researcher or some other specific field that would take a lot of schooling but would be very profitable. I could have done so, maybe. But I never set the goal. And I had toyed with going to the Peace Corps. I didn't do it though. There were a lot of choices I didn't make that I think I could have and the choice may have been, well, not necessarily right or wrong, but just a choice that would have landed me somewhere very different. Or not.

It may be that I didn't want to make a choice and wanted to keep my options open. But where I am now is SOMEWHERE and I did inevitably make choices that led me to exactly this point. And here I am. Where? Well, I'm not sure. Thankfully, I'm content. Would I have been content had I made other choices? Maybe. Maybe not.

But what a convoluted way to get somewhere? I suddenly feel so directionless. Where do I expect to be in 5 years? I still don't know that. I need some life milestone markers on a sheet of paper marking the years of my life and then I'll post the milestones on the applicable years where I think I'll have gotten them accomplished by. And then I'll know whether or not I'm where I wanted to be. But I don't know what the milestones are. Heaven help me! I'm taking a test and I don't know any of the answers! And it's my LIFE, people!

I just feel so goally inadequate with that question. It EATS me. Suddenly just the pursuit of being happy seems so unaccomplished. So undefined. I need markers, dangit! I want some cold hard evidence that I actually am somewhere, that that somewhere is where I'd planned to be and a way of defining where that is. I need a measuring stick! Something!

And yet, I am pretty happy. Eh. On second thoughts, I'm just gonna keep with my current modus operandi and pick my goals willy nilly as I please. I'll get over the ambiguity of my uncertain future. Apparently it hasn't bothered me too much in the past, being I hadn't noticed before now. I guess my haphazard life suits me. How 'bout yours?

Weekly Word

Lately, my world is full of words I half-know. I'm trying to put words I half-know in the know. So maybe I could sound smart and make other people think I actually AM smart because of my impressive word usage. In my quest to appear to my fellow men to be smarter than the average bear, I offer up this week's Weekly Word:

Auspice
Function: noun
Definition:
1) observation by an auger, especially of the flight and feeding of birds to discover omens.
2)plural, kindly patronage and guidance
3) a prophetic sign; especially a favorable sign.

I had not idea it was so fortune-telling related. How scandalous a word. Oh, and I'm really just kidding about the impressing people thing. Really.

Too young?

So, I have totally been slacking in my blog postings the last while. Life has been a bit stressful, and well, when there is stress in my life, blogging doesn't really happen. As a matter of fact, it doesn't even cross my mind. Fortunately, Sharona is a dedicated sole, full of pictures, stories, and even has taken over weekly word duties....oh how lovely!! :)

Alas, I have decided to take some time to write a bit on the ol' blog. For the last little while I have had several conversations in regards to religion and its applicability in life...but I seem to always feel like I talk about religion, so I decided that I am going to write about the other topic I LOOOOVVVEEEE so much.....dating!

Everyone who knows me, knows I don't date much. Not because of opportunity, but because of lack of desire and/or time. I meet a ton of girls on a regular basis, and for some crazy reason, a lot of them seem interested in going out with me (I think its for the sex, but well, I don't think that works so well for them). Finding a quality girl is a lot more difficult to find then one might think. Most of the time they are not mormons, but that has never stopped me before. (no need for chastisement, lectures on temple marriage, or related....trust me I have heard it all.....I just don't meet that many mormons.) For the last while though, the girls that have been, shall we say, very persistent, ...they seem to be getting younger and younger....just the other day I was checking the law for what was the legal age in my state!! (Just kidding! I was not checking what was legal, but maybe I should have - don't tell anyone!)

So, the question then presents itself....how young is too young? Full disclosure I am 31...and shockingly only a few years into my career (yeah, I liked school a little too much). I have heard a bunch of stories. For example, the other day a friend of mine and I were out to dinner, and the waitress slipped me her number on the sly (no I didn't ask for it!), but the looks of her, she was maybe 23, and with my ability to guess ages, probably 19 or 20...but very cute, and we did exchange at least 2 or 3 very short and spontaneous quips, which is definitely enough to base a relationship out of. The conversation came up when my friend and I inquired as to how young is too you, because there was a fairly persistent individual at the ripe ol' age of 23 which I can't seem to shake without being a bit rude. Her response was it is all dependent on the "maturity level of the individuals."

Now, I don't know the average bear, but most of my life I have tended to date girls that were at a minimum my age, and the majority of the time a bit older. So, on the basis of maturity, either I was a fantastically mature teenager, or those mid XXXX somethings were really really immature. Granted, every time I have been to a palm reader or other soothsayer....they always start with "you are a very old sole"....but really how old can you be til it gets creepy? On the flip, one could probably comfortably say we were just sick and wrong....bring out the police and lock us all up. While I don't think I would recommend someone follow in my footsteps, I don't care too much for or about age as long as the girl is my age and older, but any time a girl is younger than me, yeesh, I get the heeebeeeejeeebeees! (I can't spell that word).

I have also heard the 1/2 your age + 7 rule...which on the whole seems logical, but in my situation, that puts the dating range down to like 23.....hello....can we say cradle robber...no offense, but that is just wrong W-R-O-N-G wrong.

Then there is the thing that gets around in my head....I have a sister that is XX and another sister older than me that is XX (ages are withheld for fear of sheer torture, retribution, and just downright anger!) and I am in the middle of the two. It always seems odd to date people younger than the one and older than the other.... at least now that I seem to look for people to date with a more serious intent rather than kicks and giggles.....although I do enjoy my fair share of giggles....not so much the kicks...hmmmm. The problem is that only leaves me with a few year discrepancy......oh the dilemnas!

I'm sure there are other metrics or rationale out there, and I am all inclined to hear them, so please oh please tell me your words of wisdom!

Weekly Word Double!!

This week, I decided to post not one, but TWO, weekly words. The first I heard as I was listening to the news on the radio this morning during my commute to work:

Abstruse
function: adjective
definition: difficult to comprehend; recondite

How appropriate, since when I heard it I found the word abstruse to be abstruse at the time. He he he.

The second word, oddly enough, I didn't hear anywhere recently. I was just thinking of abstruse and all the other words I don't know and then I thought, "Yeah. Like that word 'concomitant'. I don't know that one either." And then I thought it's kind of funny to think of a word you don't know. If I'm able to conjure the word without external clues or information, doesn't that mean that, in some way, shape or form, I must know it? Is this also not a bit abstruse? Well, whatever it is, I couldn't conjure the definition without external guidance of Merriam Webster.

Concomitant
function: also an adjective
definition: accompanying, especially in a subordinate or incidental way

My Perch

Every day, Monday thru Friday, I go to work. Thankfully, I like work. There are many reasons. And while many of the many reasons may not be viewable to the naked eye, there is one reason that is. That reason is because of where I work. Not only is the building cool, but so is the view from the office. I didn't get the best view of the outside of the building, but here is at least one angle, from which you can actually take a gander of my office from the outside:



I really enjoy this building because firstly, it reminds me of something I'd see in a Tim Burton cartoon movie, like James and the Giant Peach -- only it's a real building, even with all of its absurd angles and shapes. And it has lots of open space and high ceilings inside.

If you look where the doors are to the left of the trees, there is a big box of windows right above it. That's MY office!

And here is the view from my office:



Even more, if I were a taller sort of person, I would see a different view because, as you can see from this picture, the view just keeps going up, up and up:



Now, ordinarily I wouldn't boast about something like this. However, I think it is completely obvious that in a building full of elite PhD faculty and otherwise important people, I am a peon and completely undeserving of this most lovely perch. And somehow this makes it ok for me to brag away -- I mean share with you all. Ahem.

Now, a note about the less aesthetically pleasing, but somewhat entertaining views, this is the taping job that I wear around these days:



I wore it to church last week and no one said a word, so I just figured it wasn't as obvious as I thought. I found out otherwise when I went to church today and EVERYBODY was wondering what ON EARTH happened to me, "poor thing." I'm a bit of a pessimist and I don't really think this is going to stave off my ankle injury through marathon training for the next four months. It's good stuff, but I'm not sure anything is THAT good. But I will be sporting it for as long as I am going to be training, I think. Quite the fashion statement. Yeah, I think everyone will be wearing these sooner or later. It's totally cool. Ben said it looked like I was wearing "V" for victory -- right before he started to refuse to be seen with me in public.

Did I Do That?

So much for slim chances. Yesterday afternoon, I checked my email and found this inside my box waiting for me.

marathonmailer@nyrr.org to me

June 4, 2009

Countdown to the start November 1, 2009:
149 Days
Dear Sharon Young,
Entry Number:
Congratulations! You have been accepted to run the ING New York City Marathon 2009 on Sunday, November 1. On behalf of New York Road Runners, I welcome you to the 40th running of the world’s greatest marathon. We’re hard at work preparing to give you the experience of a lifetime.
Please visit the ING New York City Marathon Entrant Login at your earliest convenience. From this page you can provide or verify your emergency race-day contact, supply information that will allow us to assign your race-day transportation to the start, cancel your entry if needed, and take advantage of special offers for marathon entrants.
You’ll need your username and password to access the Entrant Login. If you don’t know your username and/or password, please e-mail reghelp@nyrr.org. Include your name and entry number in your e-mail.
Please consider using your marathon experience as an opportunity to raise money for Team for Kids or another worthy cause. Visit our charities page for more information.
We’ll be in touch frequently between now and race day, and we’ll post the latest news on the ING New York City Marathon site. We look forward to seeing you in November!
Sincerely,

Mary Wittenberg
President and CEO, New York Road Runners
Race Director, ING New York City Marathon

I think I'm in for it. This means I actually need to train. Aye aye aye.

Weekly Word: Sycophant

You guys might already know this word. I know I've heard it before, and I even know that it's a word I would not like to be associated with. But do I really know what it means? Well, when one of the professors at the university here decided to use it in an email to me in regards to one of the students in our graduate program who took his course (ouch!). I thought I'd look it up to make sure.

Turns out upon further investigation, I didn't have a firm grasp of the word previously. But now that I've checked, I can read or use or refer to it without hesitation. It's a fun word. It makes me wish I insulted people more often so I'd have more opportunity to use it. Word like this do that. And words like dungus-head. Or k-nigget. Too bad.

Which brings me to another thought..... If they used words like stapler or fax to describe people negatively, would people like being negative a lot less?

In case you too were unsure, here it is:

Sycophant
function: noun
definition: a servile, self-seeking flatterer.
synonom: parasite

Like I said, "Ouch!". Best wishes to you in avoiding the aquaintance of or other involvement with sycophants in the near future.